I think you did good by moving out. NTA. Not one that cares only after you've reached the boiling point and explode. NTA, this seems like an unhealthy situation to be in. That doesnt make it an attack. Lots of hugs from France. No. I was confused, and then realization struck, it was his pee. Nta, your family sound like giant bags of garbage. NTA. Kids how ever use their rooms during the day. Your dad for all his kids (including you), the grandparents for your siblings and even your sibling for their departed mother (obviously in a warped manner as they have been emotionally abused). This was a decades long pattern of behavior that will continue if they are allowed access. This is one of those situations where you are so obviously NTA it seems strange you even have to ask - op, you are a victim of your familys abuses. My father sacrificed everything to give me and my brother the rest of our childhood. Keep them away from your child.
Who I am criticising now is every overly sensitive person that believes downvoting me will make my point less valid simply because they can't handle a point of view based on reason and common sense. Its possible shes only mad because now the family knows what shes been letting happen to you. Not just for this but every other time. The fact that both your step siblings are older than you and still manage to act like petty ass KIDS is disgusting. Oh for sure OP is NTA. And he made my mom financially dependent on him, so she didnt think she could leave him and support us on her own in that era. Contact a lawyer and CPS. It's very valid that he's hurt I can't imagine how messy and heartbreaking the whole ordeal was for him but you can respect his feelings without feeling at fault for them. They also had foster kids that shared a room and they were both girls. He came into my life when I was 5 and my mom and him got married a year later. Good luck! Agree. Your "correction" is disingenuous as the sentence already totally implies that. NTA: Your dads kids need help. Now, I may seem like a hypocrite, as I'm about to talk/complain about my own issues. They are. I'm continually boggled by how many of these stories are posted about kids being full of rage at their stepmoms, and spending their lifetimes expressing their hatred in so many ways, while completely failing to see where the problem really started: the dad's dick. Some ideas: Somewhere you can lock up your valuables and sentimental items so your stepsister cant get to them, the removal of the lock on the door, for them to step up and enforce the rules when stepsister is being unfair to you. People are mad at your mother because of her actions, not yours. I guess what I am saying is, given your siblings' recent history how could you not see this coming when he asked you for help? Stay away if you can. Nta I'm glad to hear that your uncle had your back. Your stepfather and step siblings are insanely toxic. NTA there is a reason why your family is also having such a harsh reaction towards her. She lost her dad, had no private space, dealing with a tempermental step sister, continuous conflict.. That's too much. I mean that's the same guy who got insecure about the belongings of a deceased person, so it fits the bill. The values your step-dad holds ( maybe your mom too? Sounds like your Dad knows what's true but maybe had one last hope for some peace. You deserve to be in your own space and it sounds like you didn't have time to grieve your father's passing. Congratulations on getting free. I know the comments are giving the message loud and clear, but when your entire family is telling your mum to go take a long walk off a short pier as well and saying she's terrible, please know you've done the right thing here. And your stepsister is seriously unhinged. Make sure you make this separation legal and your uncle gets the checks for your benefit. I am sorry.
I am so glad you have somewhere to go and people who love you. And it wasn't even his wife holding onto possessions he was insecure about but the daughter. Sometimes, the biggest kindness you can do someone is to be clear. The step siblings are acting like children, the step-dad seems like a sexist prick, and the mom is doing absolutely nothing to make sure OP is loved, valued, and safe in their own home. Your mother has enabled your stepdad to an appalling level and its time to go. Hopefully he's in a position to support you until you're ready to be independent. You were in an abusive situation and I would never set foot back in that house if I were you. I hope everything works out. Is there a reason for that? Uninviting My Stepson From Our Anniversary Trip To Disney World, My Husband Feels Bad For His - AITAThere are 4 stories0:00 Story 14:11 Story 28:25 Story 311. I would seriously send her a link to this post. Nta. She recently accused me if stealing her tools and convinced her dad to get a lock so now I'm being forcefully locked out and can't get in til after a huge argument and getting mom involved. Guest rooms are supposed to be practical and nice for a couple of nights, but remember, when guests get too comfortable in there they overstay their welcome."
Thankfully yes (and its the only copy) If OP's dad died 3 years ago then Stepbrother was 17/18 when OP's mom remarried. NTA. Their mother sounds like a complete sociopath who succeeded in completely brainwashing her children into believing her insane bullshit. I agree with previous poster that 18 would have been moving day. Lower middle class kid here. Grown adults still doing this? Youre right, the judgement was decided well before we read the flower box was destroyed. And she knew the odds of her getting away with it were good so she did it with that in mind. However, I am assuming from the fact that you still speak with him and refer to him as "dad" and not specifically step-dad or even his first name, that you at least have a decent (if not good) relationship with him. Your sister does not have the right to demand you out of a shared space or lock you out of it. Now 18 is more than old enough to realize that's not OP's fault and not to punish OP for it, but it's also still young enough that she might be expecting and demanding to use her room the way she always has and not really realizing the things she has to give up to share. May I ask, have you asked them point-blank what their problem is? Step-dad is a sexist, crappy father who raised bratty kids. They hate you and your mom and have been cruel to you both for years. But it's not on you to fix this, certainly not at the risk of your mother or kid. You dont need that kind of pain in your life with a child on the way. Thats awful, Im so sorry. Good luck! Your mom needs to grow a spine and stand up to her husband and his children's (especially his daughter) mistreatment of you. But if he does have to live at home (I understand covid/pandemic issues may have delayed his ability to leave) he should be in the smaller room and you and your step-sister should have been sharing the bigger room. The mother cares more about having a man in her life than she does about protecting her daughter from the mental and emotional abuse that was dished out to her. I agree it's common sense if OP was an actual adult. Sounds like a very toxic environment - you did the right thing. Don't do it. They like being married because they had a good marriage. NTA. Your mom is a failure as a parent. Your step siblings need reality checks. It's child abuse to use children as weapons. She didn't protect you from your step dads insecurities when most of your dads things were thrown out. After Abuelo finished digging out the basement on the farm house, there was a bit more room. Jfc. I think u/MamaAvalon was referencing the fact that if teens are sharing a room there are some private-time activities that teens are notorious for spending a lot of time doing which they can't do in the privacy of their own bedroom and so will spend an inordinate amount of time "in the bathroom" which keeps the bathroom occupied from other users Yeah but their point is still valid. Your step siblings are all assholes, more-so your step brother since he implied that your were implicit in his childish prank. Also at 16 she can't move out with a legal guardian's permission. HA! She sounds horrid, good riddance. No punishment of your stepsister will make up for the jealousy and sexism of your stepfather. For real, sharers should always get a bigger room, that's just common sense. The dad, who is really responsible for the mess, is the one who finally pays. Especially during these times. Your mom failed you. Even with the bare base though, hard NTA. NTA, your step siblings are 20 and 18 and the first thing they think of when they're mad at someone is to destroy that person's belongings?
To be clear, your mom was perfectly fine to move on, but she should have taken steps to ensure you were processing your grief in a healthy way, and that you were comfortable with the change in environment. Here's hoping OP can stick at her uncle's house. Leave your mother and stepfather to drive away absolutely everybody, while they continue to coddle and entertain her evil behaviour. Stay away. "They'd asked him questions like what joke he'd like to tell his future MIL, his opinions on abortion, jesus, gender equality etc," the post explained. It was wrong of your mother to keep you in that toxic environment. If you even think about going back there, you need have have a very frank one-on-one conversation with your mother first. Taking the living room or dining room as a bedroom? Mom also helped create this situation by sticking girls in a room when they are constantly in conflict. And dont listen to their guilt trips. Children must have such whiplash between their mother and father.
Archived post. Id cut these people out of my life as an adult. Thank the gods that you have that uncle. Then let him lock you out of your own room. To lose the living room, the common space in the household so every teen can have their own room is pandering and that family needs to get a grip. You deserve some peace and quiet. But damn. Author admin Posted on May 27, 2022 May 27, 2022 Categories Uncategorized Post navigation. One point to note to echo on this wonderful post: do you feel emotionally safer and better taken care of at your uncles? Your story reads as if they are children. I hope you know that you did nothing to deserve all of this. Destruction of personal property is never warranted, they were both assholes for doing it to one another, and their father failed his duty by letting it happen. Theyre going to be fun roommates. Do they want to be part of your life? Just, just, what? Lets see if her step kids will give two shites about her when shes old and infirm. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. It sounds like you are living in a nightmare. Nta, you have been failed multiple times. The whole time you were treated like a lesser family member at the behest of her new husband, your mom did nothing!
The fact that you were being locked out of your own bedroom is just crazy. The kids are adults now, so the fact they haven't gone out of that mindset is very dangerous, and the fact he is upset but not doing more about it is very bad. Your stepbrother and stepsister are grown ass adults ffs. Im truly sorry that she ruined it. Anyways, sorry, I know you probably meant well and I'm not trying to be an AH myself or anything.
You have almost nothing of your dads because her new husband doesnt want any reminders of him around?
Everyone jumps to such weird conclusions nowadays unless kids live in the utmost privilege but room sharing in theory is not abusive or anything. Nta. I googled it and it's classified as a "Social Platform." New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Edit to add this : OP I hope youre able to have the loving and respectful environment you deserve from now on. She's mad at my stepdad and stepsister and the whole family is in conflict because of me moving out though I could've agreed to get it fixed and let it go. Your brothers are 30, they need to grow up. Stay with him as long as you can and do not go back to your mom because she is obviously not taking accountability for her actions in this. This poor baby. The master bedroom is grand, and the two additional rooms are tiny. Im guessing shes not down with gay sex, either. NTA.You're not wrong in that his kids are messed up, but that's because their mother poisoned them against you and your mother, and while they are adults, sometimes the way you are manipulated and twisted into thinking as a child isn't an easy thing to break, even with therapy. From disregarding your daughters grieving process in regards to her father's death, allowing her to be raised in an unhealthy gender roll dominated environment (two kids splitting a smaller room then a single child because he pees standing up?) You are not any sort of asshole. Definitely NTA!! Ignore OP She should involve the courts to obtain that. They are clearly not emotionally stable. Im sure she had no problem spending or getting your stepdad to agree to keep any SS benefit she gets for you for your dad having passed away. The amount of disrespect is unbelievable, I recommend no contact for as long as it takes for your to get over this with your mom. The last time they said anything to her was via Facebook a few years ago. Don't feel guilty for reaching it and always take care of yourself. How else you would call getting a lock for the door of their shared room so his daughter can lock his wife's daughter out on whim? You're the child in this situation and it isn't your fault for everything that went down. Your stepbrother used you, your stepsister abuses you, and your mother has done little to set ground rules for them on how to actually treat you. And your mom and stepdad are insensitive as eff. There are multiple cases of Children suing Step/Parents for abuse and winning. OPs mom is sexist AF. The way the movie unfolds, you assume for most of the 'prank' that it's real and the kids are just as confused as Mia. NTA.
NTA. NTA. And prepared a nice wooden letter shaped pot ~used my dad's first initial~ Her dad died about 3 years ago, that probably means she hasnt known these people for long Its not automatically sexist, it could be, but it could also not be. Hes 60. I am willing to bet your uncle and other family members were wanting to help you sooner but felt pressured by your mother and SD. That's bad parenting all around and that too would have been enough for your extended family to be mad on your behalf. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. She let her husband's daughter lock you out of your room during the day over a lie the daughter told about you, although that got fixed. If you have each in a separate bedroom but only one bathroom, that also works out okay. They are toxic in your life. The kids were not brainwashed into hating their father, but I know she tried. While you were kicked out of your own room for most the day, your mom did nothing! They refused to acknowledge her or they would make up weird stories about her.
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